Yel Kaye – Travel Blog, Writing and Photography

1. The Choco-banano lady. I think I have already mentioned this woman several times, and for good reason. From morning to evening, you can knock on this unmarked door and her smiling face (or the smiling face of her indigenous maid) will appear through the window and greet you. Sure, her chocolate-covered fruit, homemade cookies, cakes and snacks are great. But what really makes this lady a treat is that she is always happy to see you, and will remember you even if you are gone from Xela for awhile.

2. The karaoke host at Buddha Bar. He is one of those men so adorable it takes all your strength not to squeeze him to death. He manages the rowdy crowd at karaoke night with a smile, sings well, and doles out free drinks (prizes for high scores) with a firm and fair hand.

3. The parking lot man near Celas Maya. It seems like this man’s job consists entirely of chatting up passerbys and yelling DELE DELE DELE!! when a car is entering the lot. He is there all day, every day, without exception.\

4. The hippies in front of the Despensa Familiar. Have you guys ever sold any jewellery? (I certainly haven’t seen you sell any.) Are you guys really just drug dealers? Do you realize the irony that you sit right in front of a Walmart-owned grocery store, living the counter-culture life?

Speaking of Despensa Familiar…

5. The guy in the checkout aisle at Despensa Familiar. The lineups at Despensa are always long. At any given time, there are gringas buying granola and chickpeas, a Mayan family of ten buying a lifetime supply of cereal, a young cool dude recharging his cellphone and someone stocking up on 14 bottles of rum and Quetzalteca. Regardless, this guy never, I repeat never loses his cool. He rings stuff in, takes money and gives change at record-breaking speed. Is he a robot? I might never know.

6. The dried herb lady at Mercado las Flores. Lady, you must be 10,000 years old. The fact that you are still standing, let alone know everything about every herb in Guatemala, is incredible.

7. The salsa boys. There are a few of you, but the best we’ve nicknamed “Babyface” and “Muscles.” You are each about 21 years old, and think you are totally hot shit. Ok, you are totally hot shit. My roommate and I spend an hour each night talking about how hot you are, and how we already feel like cougars in our late 20s.